Happy Anniversary to the man who has saturated my life with
laughter in abundance, inspiration to the max, and love with no bounds.
“If they be two, they are two so As stiff twin compasses are two; Thy soul, the fixed foot, makes no show To move, but doth, if the other do…. Thy firmness makes my circle just, And makes me end where I begun.” // John Donne
I recently read the poem “If” by Rudyard Kipling with one of my classes. Even though I taught this same poem last year, these lines caught my attention this year:
“If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run…”
Any time I read the word “unforgiveness,” I feel a small twinge in my heart, because I know it is one of my weaknesses. I struggle with pride and stubbornness, two traits that make it very difficult for me to apologize and admit mistakes.
However, I realize that conflict creates a chasm between people that, if rectified, can bring them closer than they were before the divide. I recently heard someone advise married couples to race their spouse to apologize anytime there is conflict. I think this imagery perfectly coincides with the lines from Kipling’s poem. What if, rather than sitting in that ominous silence after an argument and waiting for the other to speak first, we raced each other to be the first to humble ourselves and admit to wrong?
Tanner is the perfect example of this. As soon as anything even slightly offensive escapes his lips (which happens only rarely), he immediately apologies and asks for forgiveness. Ever since I recognized this humility in him when were dating, I was both convicted and inspired.
I aspire to continue to grow in humility so that in the unforgiving minute, I can learn to run the distance and close the chasm.
I am so blessed to be surrounded by talented friends and family. This week, I was invited by my friends at Hartt Productions to share a little bit about my wedding day. It was perfect timing, since Tanner and I just celebrated our second anniversary. Hartt Productions is passionate about capturing weddings through film to make each special moment of the day timeless.
“We strive to make every couple feel as though their film is a representation of who they were the moment they completed their vows and there is no better medium to relive that version of yourself than through one of our films.” – Hartt Productions
Read my blog post here, and find out more about Hartt Productions and their work here!
I will always cherish October as the month that I first started falling in love with my husband. The crispness of the air, the cawking of the crows, and the anticipation of the coming holidays all remind me of the days when we first got to know each other.
Our friendship began in high school through studying together and being in theatre together. I quickly started getting butterflies each time he looked at me with his gorgeous blue eyes or shared his thoughts with me about God and life.
While we were dating, we used to spend hours each night talking on the phone. I will always remember one evening in particular when he told me he had heard a song, and that it reminded him of me…
“I think that possibly, maybe I’m falling for you Yes there’s a chance that I’ve fallen quite hard over you I’ve seen the paths that your eyes wander down I want to come too
I think that possibly, maybe I’m falling for you
No one understands me quite like you do Through all of the shadowy corners of me”
As the years pass by, I feel increasingly grateful for the boy who shared that song with me that night, and for the strong, kind, intelligent, and gentle man he has become. And the longer we are together, the more I thank God for someone who understands “all of the shadowy corners of me” and who has chosen me to love and to cherish. And I look forward to falling for him over and over for the rest of our lives.
“We are not the same persons this year as last; nor are those we love.
It is a happy chance if we, changing, continue to love a changed person.”
– William Somerset Maugham
Although I’m sure William Somerset Maugham was a talented writer, I have to disagree with this sentiment. I don’t really believe in “happy chances.” I think that loving a person over time and throughout change takes sacrifice, commitment, forgiveness, and unconditional love – not chance.
Tanner and I have been so blessed to have parents who have modeled this selflessness in their marriages. Throughout my lifetime I have witnessed my parents change and transition through various seasons of life, and yet they have always continued to serve each other and appreciate changes in one another even during obstacles in life. It is such a beautiful portrayal of Christ’s love for the church.
“Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God… Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” -Ephesians 5: 1-2, 25
I am so grateful to my parents and for Tanner’s parents, and for the example they have set not only for me, but also for everyone who knows them. The love they each share in their marriages, along with their undiminishing commitment, is something I aspire to and admire.
Because of this, I am proud to share our anniversary week with them, and I look forward to many joyous years of celebrating our three marriages together! Happy Anniversary!
As I’ve been thinking about my identity lately, I can’t think of a more perfect time to reflect on my newest role in life as a wife than on my anniversary week!
I am that wife who totally adores her husband.
I am not that wife who prepares a perfect meal every day.
I am that wife who loves to clean and do laundry.
I am not that wife who likes independence.
I am that wife who looks forward to staying home with her children someday.
I am not that wife who loves to go out every night.
I am that wife who likes to reminisce about her wedding…even though it was only a year ago.
I am not that wife who talks about her husband negatively to her friends.
I am that wife who trusts her husband with the finances.
I am that wife who dresses up for her husband.
I am that wife that never doubts she picked the perfect man to love and to serve forever.
As I’ve mentioned before, I was totally blessed that my husband planned our entire honeymoon as a surprise for me last year. I had no idea where we were going until we printed our boarding passes at the airport… although, he had told me the weather forecast beforehand for packing purposes! He took me to Oceanside, Oregon, and it was the most beautiful, perfect trip I could have ever imagined.
I will forever cherish the long conversations as we drove through the winding roads, the laughter that echoed in the empty woods as we hiked, the holding hands as we walked along the beach and explored, and the love that we shared as we dreamed about our future as husband and wife.
Thank you, babe, for all the time and effort you put into planning such a magical week!
This man. Where do I begin? In high school his sweet smile, gorgeous blue eyes, and tender spirit caught my attention. As time passed, I fell in love with him as I watched him pursue righteousness and cherish me. As we made our way through college, his passion for work and devotion to excellence inspired and challenged me. Now, after nearly one year of marriage, I continue to discover new facets of his amazing-ness every day.
I could practically create an infinite list of all of his good qualities – his never-ceasing patience, his unconditional love, his bold leadership, his depth of understanding, his dedication to peace and good communication, his passionate pursuit of God. Nevertheless, one of the characteristics that I admire the most is his servant leadership.
As we worked through our pre-marital counseling before we got married, we studied “God’s equation for marriage:”
“A ‘oneness’ in marriage is the opposite of the world’s 50/50 plan. It is a 100/100 plan in which both husband and wife commit themselves totally to each other, set aside their own selfishness, and experience true intimacy. In the 100/100 plan, there is not talk about ‘meeting each other halfway.’ You are both willing to do anything it takes to make the marriage work.” //Preparing for Marriage, Dennis Rainey
I am so blessed to be married to a man who completely lives out the 100/100 plan each day – in our marriage and in the world. His selflessness and continual commitment to serve not only me, but our families, our friends, and even strangers, provides me with such a beautiful depiction of Jesus’ self-sacrifice. And yet, in the midst of his humility and his devotion to service, he stands as a bold leader, guiding others and creating united teams.
I am awestruck that God’s grace has gifted me with such an amazing man to serve and to follow, as he leads our family with both passion and humility.